My World has Collapsed

Rob. T.

Rob. T.

Joined
Sep 5, 2020
Messages
348
Points
278

After 20yrs together my partner tells me she doesn't Love me anymore :( :( :(
She has cut off all contact with me by phone and Internet, why why why ????
Just no explanation..... :( :( :(
My life and soul is drifting in a void somewhere forever without her.
No arguments we shared everything together and stuck by each other through rough times like both of us going through the same Heart Operation within a year of each other not to mention many more memorable times.
At 56 my rock and my soul is gone :( :( :(
I just don't see what the point to my life is now :( :( :(

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Sorry to hear this my friend.
I can imagine and understand all your actual feelings.

When she did not give you no explanations and she cut off the communication -> she needs some distance to think about her own personal situation.
My personal very first opinion is, that you should not force her to communicate and explain - better would be to give her some time
Maybe she is getting also the feeling, that she is missing you and the time with you
Give her some time
 
Rob. T. said:
After 20yrs together my partner tells me she doesn't Love me anymore :( :( :(
She has cut off all contact with me by phone and Internet, why why why ????
Just no explanation..... :( :( :(
My life and soul is drifting in a void somewhere forever without her.
No arguments we shared everything together and stuck by each other through rough times like both of us going through the same Heart Operation within a year of each other not to mention many more memorable times.
At 56 my rock and my soul is gone :( :( :(
I just don't see what the point to my life is now :( :( :(

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Time will fix you for sure. Meanwhile, just hold on. In my experience, friends have helped my out so much.
 
Sir, I helped my brother through the same situation. He was absolutely devastated !
constant contact and some professional help. Then he says “ time does heal all things “ That was one of the best things I’ve ever heard him say.

Give it time, give her space. Booze and drugs will only make the rabbit hole deeper and harder to get out of.
you can and will get through this.

Day by day !
 
Steady on mate. She may be back. Sometimes they have to see what they are going to miss before they know what they left behind. Give her time and let her sort things out. While she is gone you can spend more time with friend and family as a support system. Try and stay busy to keep from getting inside your head too much. These things have ways of working themselves out. Each day will be a bit better. When she is ready she will be in contact. Steady on.
 
Stutzi said:
I understand your pain but what does this have to do with naval modeling?
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years ago, i lost my brother him and i were very close. I posted the loss of my brother on the NRG forum because i thought i was among friends. the reply was as you posted what did my personal loss have to do with model ships and the post was removed. That was as hard to take as losing my brother realizing all these guys i personally knew were not my friends.
Here on Ships of Scale it is about building model ships but most of all it is a community of people that share all of life's experiences. i can say without a doubt i have friends here.

so Rob T i feel your loss and we are all here for support feel free to express your feelings we are not robots programed to build ship models we are humans to connect to.
 
I'm sorry what happened to you. Don't get me wrong, but based on my own experience, generally no one changes something they have (good) for nothing. Although there are exceptions
If she told you that she doesn't love you anymore, reflect on what I've told you.
The most important thing of all: Time heals all.
The best therapy to avoid thinking about things is work that requires effort, such as cutting wood, fixing the car or furniture.
This way you sleep well at night and don't have your head spinning.
Force...!!!
 
Dave Stevens (Lumberyard) said:
years ago, i lost my brother him and i were very close. I posted the loss of my brother on the NRG forum because i thought i was among friends. the reply was as you posted what did my personal loss have to do with model ships and the post was removed. That was as hard to take as losing my brother realizing all these guys i personally knew were not my friends.
Here on Ships of Scale it is about building model ships but most of all it is a community of people that share all of life's experiences. i can say without a doubt i have friends here.

so Rob T i feel your loss and we are all here for support feel free to express your feelings we are not robots programed to build ship models we are humans to connect to.
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I second that! Its about fellowship.
 
I'm sorry to hear of your situation. I'd like to say I understand, but I don't. I've never experienced what you're going through, so to say I can relate would be disrespectful. As others have noted, now is the time to reach out to friends and family. Try to focus on other things that deeply occupy your mind so you don't dwell on the loss. But also as others have mentioned, now is not the time to try to deaden the pain with alcohol or drugs. I'm not saying you're a person who would do such a thing, but I would say that when we're at our lowest, we can sometimes make poor choices, and substance abuse is one of those things. I've seen that in my own family, so I make the comment with sincerity and a full understanding of the damage that can occur as a result of misuse. I wish you the very best, and though your heart is obviously breaking now, time does, and will... heal the pain. She'll always have a piece of your heart, but as time marches on, you'll begin to forget this period in time, and your memories will be of the good times you had together. Those are the memories that last.
 
Hello,

That's bad and certainly incomprehensible at the moment, but don't lose heart. Maybe your partner just needs some time. Give her time. You yourself will also need time to keep your balance. Make sure that you also think about yourself in this situation. Simply leaving a partner after 20 years without explanation is not fair and not nice. I hope that you find yourself and your inner peace again. Unfortunately, nobody can do that for you. But share yourself here. Talk about it. There are lots of colleagues here to help you and at some point you will be able to move on...I wish you lots of strength and patience. Look ahead

Das ist schlimm und im Moment sicher unverständlich, aber lassen Sie sich nicht entmutigen. Vielleicht braucht Ihre Partnerin nur etwas Zeit. Geben Sie ihr Zeit. Auch Sie selbst werden Zeit brauchen, um Ihr Gleichgewicht zu finden. Achten Sie darauf, dass Sie in dieser Situation auch an sich selbst denken. Einen Partner nach 20 Jahren ohne Erklärung einfach zu verlassen, ist nicht fair und nicht schön. Ich wünsche Ihnen, dass Sie zu sich selbst und zu Ihrem inneren Frieden zurückfinden. Leider kann das niemand für Sie tun. Aber teilen Sie sich hier mit. Sprechen Sie darüber. Hier gibt es viele Kolleginnen und Kollegen, die Ihnen helfen und irgendwann werden Sie wieder glücklich sein können...Ich wünsche Ihnen viel Kraft und Geduld. Blicken Sie nach vorn. Alles Gute
 
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Ev and i are still together and still going strong after 45 years but Ev is not the first before Ev i had 2 wives and a lot of relationships between. so i know what you are going through. I thought for sure number 2 was the one but she just up and walked away. That was definitely a hard time getting past the why? But a friend at the time said congratulations you became a Neutron star one of the most extreme and exotic objects in the known universe.
to collapse in on oneself the intensity of being is extremely strong embrace it and discover Rob T.
Neutron stars shed outer layers cool around the collapsing core, which, if it is massive enough, will begin a new, forging a new you and a new life.
now is the time to reinvent yourself maybe she no longer loves the old you but what about the new you?
 
Jorel said:
The answer is that we are a community of like minded folk and he needs "family". But as cdnfurball indicated, professional help may do some good? God bless you.
Carl
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Agreed. The administrators of this forum would otherwise not have included a place for airing just such issues. It demonstrates our shared humanity and capacity for compassion beyond our shared love of modelbuilding. All I can contribute is lean on your loved ones and a few true friends in times of trial. I remember the pain of such a bewildering dilemma to be among the most excruciating I have known.:eek:
I hope and pray for an acceptable resolution to your dilemma.

Sincerely, Pete
 
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